Tag Archives: Final exams

Almost There, Part 2

21 Nov

M2 called me the minute she got home yesterday. I could hear the frustration and agony in her voice when she told me the remaining results and the final average mark, 73. No further improvements from the last count and one short from achieving the 74 mark set.

Ouch. The almost there is not quite there. So near yet so far.

In my mind, I recalled the hubby reminding me to be objective and to look at the bigger picture of things. It shouldn’t be that small failure that determines the situation.

I talked to her while in my mind, I was analyzing the bigger picture and realized that M2 did study hard. Only one subject came in with a horrifying result, a plunge from a ‘B’ to a disastrous ‘D’! The other subjects saw an overall improvement and an increase in total marks. For this improvement, how can I fault her and say she did not study and try her best? A bit unfair, no?

So rather than focusing on the near miss of the 74 average for all, I relooked at the qualifying factor and adjusted it so that M2 can have a sense of achievement. After all, our intention is purely to motivate with reward and not punish with frustration.

I decided then to give a probational reward (the right to use the iPhone4) because the fact is evident that there was an improvement and we should not ignore this effort. Come next year, if she improves further on what she has achieved this time, the phone remains in her possession. But if there is a decline in the results, the phone comes back to me, hence the probational clause.

This is the best solution for now. I don’t feel mean, she feels relieved and happy and today, being the last day of school, it should end on a happy note.

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Almost There

20 Nov

Every child is different in their ability and strength. We should never compare in order to nurture and coax the child to grow in confidence. Having said that, it is evident that my M1 and M2 are different in their abilities. As far as studies are concerned, I never have to worry about one but the other, well, a lot of nurturing along the way. But we never compare.

While M1 is still facing her SPM exams, final year-end exams for M2 came and went. The target has been set again—just to push her a little—for her to achieve and have a sense of satisfaction. However, it is set slightly lower than before; she requested for this ‘magical’ number. I could not maintain nor raise it higher than the 80 mark, set for the mid-term earlier, because she and I both agreed it will never be achieved. So in order not to demoralize her, we agreed to set it at 74, an overall average for all the subjects.

I figured better to have something within reach to motivate her rather than something impossible then she will never try hard or taste success. She missed the mid-term mark by a mile and was very demoralized about it.

As it is, some results have come back earlier in the week; she had hits and misses and the average worked out to be 71. Then the next day, four more subjects came back and amazingly, the average went up to 73! Almost there…

But there are 5 more subjects to come back. Let’s just hope she achieves it and understands the meaning of hard work, perseverance and success. The reward: the long awaited inheritance of my old iPhone4.

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